


and every breath we drew was hallelujah

by mostpeculiarmademoiselle



Category: Newsies (1992), Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Era, Davey Jacobs Needs A Hug, First Time, Getting Together, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Period-Typical Homophobia, Religious Conflict
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:07:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27744226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mostpeculiarmademoiselle/pseuds/mostpeculiarmademoiselle
Summary: “Anytime, Dave. You know I’d do anything for ‘ya.”Davey feels a surge of warmth pass through his chest at that. He turns to look up at Jack, voice wavering and unsure, and breathes, “Anything?”Jack looks down at him with wide, wide eyes as he surveys his face, trying to decipher the emotions running rampant through Davey’s head. He seems to reach a resolution and nods, and something in his expression shifts, a fierce resolve bleeding into his features. “Anything,” he repeats.Or: Davey deals with reconciling his feelings for Jack with his religious upbringing and self-doubt. Neither of them are disappointed in the outcome.
Relationships: David Jacobs/Jack Kelly
Comments: 5
Kudos: 50





	and every breath we drew was hallelujah

David Jacobs has always been the good kid.

It’s hard enough being Jewish in New York at the turn of the twentieth century, so David has always strived to stay out of trouble and do what he’s told.

He’s at the top of his class and makes good grades, he goes to temple with his parents and brother on a strict schedule, and, most pertinently, he adheres to the beliefs and principles that have been instilled in him.

For as long as he can remember, David has known that certain things are off-limits. And at the top of that list is being queer.

David remembers the whispers and appalled glances from his parents when two men holding hands passed them on the street. He’s heard the stories, how men have been imprisoned and even put to death for being in “unsavory” relationships. He remembers the homilies and sermons like they’ve been burned into his mind, talk of hellfire and damnation and punishment beyond imagination. But most predominantly, he remembers the words—words he’s heard since before he could even begin to process what they meant, but nonetheless have consistently filled him with unimaginable terror.

_Abhorrent. Abomination. Perversion._

Since the moment he could comprehend what it meant, David Jacobs has known that being gay is forbidden, a nonstarter, sometimes even a death sentence, and he has always accepted that without question.

And then Jack Kelly walks into his life, and David’s entire world comes crumbling down.

Jack is bold and passionate and caring and stubborn and everything that Davey isn’t. From the second they first meet and Jack gives him that nickname, Davey _feels_ something, like a fire burning deep within his soul. It scares him to death, but with it comes an insatiable curiosity that aches to be satisfied.

He notices little things, tiny, minuscule details that no one else pays any mind, like the way Jack’s eyes light up when he talks about Santa Fe, the way he scratches the back of his neck when he’s nervous, the way his nerves seem to dissipate and settle when he’s working on a painting, and Davey _aches_ to know more, to know all of him, all of his secrets and fears and desires.

He’s never felt this way about anyone, and the implications of that petrify him.

In a matter of weeks, Jack has changed Davey’s world in a million different ways, and his head spins with it.

At first Davey thinks it’s because of the strike, because of Jack’s unyielding drive and passion that Davey admires so fiercely. But then the strike is settled and Davey’s feelings _linger_ , and he starts to wonder if it’s really about the strike at all.

Because when Jack looks at him, eyes bright and strong and _burning_ in their intensity, and says that he’s staying, that he’s not going anywhere, that Santa Fe can wait, Davey feels a surge of warmth and fervor rush through him, feels hot and whole and _alive_ , and his heart pounds deep within his chest. He starts to ache, to want, to _yearn_ , and he finds himself unable to stop it.

And as each day passes, Davey finds that these feelings only intensify, that each time Jack looks at him with those deep green eyes and brazen smile, he feels utterly breathless and thunderstruck, his heart seizing in his chest and his throat suspiciously dry. And every time it happens, Davey finds himself drifting closer and closer to an understanding, a realization, that flips his world off its axis and rattles him to his core.

David Jacobs is hopelessly, irrevocably in love with Jack Kelly, and there isn’t a damn thing he can do about it.

\--

Davey and Jack are in a dark corner of the lodging house one night, a few weeks after they made the deal with Pulitzer, and they’ve settled into a comfortable silence. Jack is drawing idly in his sketchpad and Davey is trying to read, but finds himself aimlessly scanning his eyes over the same paragraph over and over again as his thoughts wander to the boy sitting next to him.

He sneaks glances when he thinks Jack isn’t looking, eyes subtly flitting over his figure. He takes in Jack’s dark hair, tousled and messy from where he’s been running a hand through it, the spare pencil tucked behind his ear, the look of concentration as he stares down at his paper, and Davey feels something in his chest twinge at the sight.

 _Not now,_ he curses himself inwardly _, not now not now not now—_

Jack seems to pick up on his distraction and looks up curiously, twirling his pencil around in his hand. “Ya’ alright there, Mouth?”

Davey startles. “Yeah Jack, I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?”

Jack raises an eyebrow, unconvinced. “Really? That why you’ve been on the same page for twenty minutes?”

Davey freezes, swallowing thickly and willing his face to keep from flushing. It doesn’t work.

Jack gives him a knowing look and sets his book down, shifting closer. “You know ‘ya can talk to me, right Dave?”

Davey nods, looking anywhere but Jack’s eyes. “I know,” he says, giving a weak smile. “It’s just—I don’t think you could help me with this.”

“Try me,” Jack says, and he moves so that they’re facing each other, barely inches apart. Davey risks a glance at Jack and feels his heart stutter at the concerned look in his eyes, and he knows that Jack _means_ it, that he really could tell Jack anything and he’d be okay with it, and that just makes his heart ache all the more.

Because he absolutely does not deserve Jack Kelly, but _God_ , does he want him.

“Dave?” Jack asks, tone full of worry, and Davey realizes that he hasn’t said anything, has just been staring, and he feels the anxiety and dread begin to claw at his throat.

Because he _can’t_ want Jack Kelly. Guys like Jack don’t fall for guys like him. And even if they did, it’s forbidden—they could go to jail or be beaten or killed and _God_ , _he can’t do this_ _—_

“I have to go,” Davey chokes out, standing abruptly and leaving Jack there, confused and bewildered, as he bolts away.

\--

Jack finds him on the roof of the lodging house, curled in on himself and trembling.  
  
“Davey?” Jack asks, voice soft and timid as he hesitates a few feet away. Davey lifts his head and takes one look at him before the tears start to fall.

Jack’s eyes widen in concern and he takes a few cautious steps forward, crouching down a few inches away.

“I’m so sorry,” Davey chokes, and the look of pain and worry on Jack’s face makes him cry harder.

“Shh, it’s alright, Dave,” Jack soothes, shifting to sit next to him. He lifts a cautious hand to rest on his shoulder, touch gentle and barely there, and Davey leans into it helplessly. “What happened?”

Davey shakes his head, afraid to speak, afraid to confess, afraid to do anything. He squeezes his eyes shut, waiting for Jack to get mad, waiting for him to leave, but he doesn’t. And God, that just makes Davey love him even more.

“Okay, we don’t have to talk about it,” Jack whispers, rubbing gentle circles into his back. “Just tell me what ya’ need.”

The words fall out before Davey can stop them. “Hold me?”

An unreadable expression crosses Jack’s face before he nods, shifting so that he has one arm wrapped around Davey’s shoulder and the other threading gently through his hair, Davey’s head leaning against his chest. Davey sinks into the embrace, the warmth of Jack’s body against his calming the torrent of emotions rushing through him.

Jack holds him like that for ages, rocking them back and forth ever so slightly, and Davey feels himself slowly begin to settle. He sniffles, raising a hand to wipe away the tears when Jack beats him to it, thumb gently brushing the moisture from his cheeks.

“Thank you,” Davey murmurs, so soft it is barely audible, and Jack pulls him impossibly closer.

“Anytime, Dave. You know I’d do anything for ‘ya.”

Davey feels a surge of warmth pass through his chest at that. He turns to look up at Jack, voice wavering and unsure, and breathes, “Anything?”

Jack looks down at him with wide, wide eyes as he surveys his face, trying to decipher the emotions running rampant through Davey’s head. He seems to reach a resolution and nods, and something in his expression shifts, a fierce resolve bleeding into his features. “Anything,” he repeats.

Davey lets out a soft gasp, the faintest exhale of breath, and gazes into the depths of Jack’s fathomless eyes, looking for any trace of doubt or uncertainty. He finds none and decides that he has nothing left to lose, so he steels himself and presses his lips to Jack’s, soft and gentle.

Jack breathes out a startled noise against his lips and Davey starts to pull away, to apologize profusely and run away and spend the rest of his life in hiding, but Jack reels him back in, placing a hand on the back of his neck to pull him closer.

Jack kisses him back, deep and hard and so full of warmth that Davey feels lightheaded. It’s inexpert and a little clumsy but nonetheless incredible, laced with a kind of love and tenderness stronger than anything Davey has ever felt, and when they finally break apart, gasping for air, Davey feels like his heart is going to beat out of his chest.

And then he catches sight of Jack, face flushed and eyes blown wide in the Manhattan sunset, gazing at Davey like he’s the only thing in the world that matters, and for the first time in his life, Davey feels _whole_.

They stare at each other for a minute, chests rising and falling in tandem, and Davey can feel the heat radiating from Jack’s body, can still taste the sweetness of his lips, and he wants, wants, _wants—_

But then reality comes rushing back to him, all his fear and anxiety and internalized self-hatred, and he feels himself start to panic again.

_Abhorrent. Abomination. Perversion._

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, eyes flitting down, refusing to meet Jack’s gaze, and suddenly his eyes feel suspiciously wet again. He shifts slightly, trying to gather the courage to stand up and walk away, but he feels a hand grasp his wrist, gentle yet firm.

“Don’t be.”

Davey’s whole world tilts on its axis. “What?”

“You heard me,” Jack breathes, and Davey’s heart seizes in his chest.

He looks up at Jack, full of doubt and apprehension and fear, but Jack just gives him a soft smile and pulls him closer, one hand coming up to gently cup Davey’s jaw.

Davey looks at him in confusion. “Jack, what—I mean, I didn’t think you—”

“You didn’t know?” Jack asks, thumb trailing across Davey’s jawline.

“What?” Davey breathes, utterly dazed.

“I’m kinda’ sorta’ crazy in love with you.”

Davey stops breathing for a minute. “You— _what?_ ”

Jack smiles wider now, a little more confident. “I said I’m in love with ‘ya, Dave. You really gonna make me repeat it?”

Davey gapes at him, stunned and utterly overwhelmed.

“Jack, I—we can’t—”

“Why can’t we?”

And Davey opens his mouth to argue, to make a rebuttal, but with Jack sitting there staring at him with such love and tenderness, lips red and swollen because _he just kissed him_ , he finds that he can’t seem to articulate the demons he’s been battling. His fears are still very much there, and the magnitude of his feelings for Jack still scare him half to death, but he finds that right here, right now, that all matters a little less.

Because Jack Kelly _loves_ him, really loves him, and God help him, Davey loves him right back. And while that thought terrifies him, rattles him to his very core, Davey realizes that there’s absolutely nothing he can do to stop it.

So he shakes his head and gives Jack a timid smile, moving closer so that he’s nearly sitting in Jack’s lap.

Jack smiles and shifts so that they’re more comfortable, hands around Davey’s waist, and gives him an appraising look. “Does this mean you love me too?” He teases, though Davey can see the hidden insecurity and anticipation in his eyes.

Davey’s breath hitches for a minute and he nods, just slightly, looking up at Jack with wide eyes, feeling scared and euphoric and every emotion in between. “Yeah, Jackie. I love you too.”

Jack’s eyes shine, bright and easy and full of longing, and he kisses Davey again, soft and sweet. Davey presses in closer, one hand tangling in Jack’s hair, and the kiss is amazing, light and unhurried and hopeful.

Jack wraps his arms around Davey tighter, pulling him in until they’re pressed flush together, and deepens the kiss, nipping at Davey’s bottom lip lightly. Davey gasps out a breath in response, and Jack surges forward, plundering every corner of his mouth.

And it’s _amazing_ , God, it’s absolutely incredible, but the gravity and weight of the moment sets in, and Davey finds the familiar fear overtaking him once again.

Because he loves this, he _wants_ this, wants Jack more than anything he’s ever known, but he was always told that he couldn’t have it. So why should he now?

_Abhorrent. Abomination. Perversion._

Jack picks up on Davey’s tension and pulls away, looking at him in concern. “You okay, Dave?”

And Davey wants to lie, wants to tell him it’s fine and that there’s nothing to worry about, but he’s just so tired of keeping it all to himself. He needs to say it. He needs Jack to know. He needs Jack to hold him close and reassure him and tell him that everything’s going to be okay.

“I’m scared,” he breathes, soft and shy and so, so unsure. He’s so embarrassed by how small and weak he sounds, but Jack just pulls him closer and tilts his head up, cupping his cheeks gently and gazing at him with such an intensity that Davey shudders.

“Me too, Dave,” Jack whispers, and Davey melts into his embrace, pliant and helpless. “But we’ll be alright.”

“How do you know?” Davey asks, and his voice breaks and quivers, practically begging Jack for reassurance. “Everyone says it’s… _wrong_ , and the laws, Jack, God, we could—“

Jack leans down and presses a kiss to his lips, soft and warm and sweet, and Davey’s fears start to soften and fade into the night air. “Because I love you, Dave,” he breathes when they break apart. “Ain’t nothin’ that can change that. Ain’t _no one_ that can change that.”

Davey lets out a quiet, involuntary whine, clinging to Jack like he’s a lifeline. “Show me,” he begs, and he’s surprised at how firm his voice sounds.

Jack looks at him in disbelief. “What?”

“You heard me,” Davey repeats, and he’s more certain now, the faintest trace of a smile ghosting his lips. “Show me how much you love me.”

Jack’s gaze is careful and vigilant, searching Davey’s face for any trace of doubt or uncertainty. “Davey, you—are you sure?“ he stammers, eyes wide and dark, as he surveys his expression. “You know I would, I’d do anything for ‘ya, but you…I don’t want ‘ya to think—"

Davey cuts him off by pressing another kiss to his lips, soft and deep and so full of love that they both feel lightheaded. He pulls away and nods, staring back at him with fierce resolve, because he’s never known anything so true, down to his bones. He needs this, needs to know that they’ll be alright, needs to _feel_ Jack, whole and warm and alive. And if he’s already this far gone, there’s nothing left to lose. “I’m sure, Jack.”

Jack hesitates for one more second, timid and cautious, before lurching forward and kissing him. Only this time, it’s different—it’s hard and passionate and bruising, Jack doing his best to devour every inch of his mouth—and God, Davey is in _heaven_.

The heat between them starts to escalate, kindling the fire that’s been burning below the surface for months, and Davey feels like his entire body is ablaze. Jack’s lips trail down his jawline and neck, sucking a hot bruise into the space just above his collarbone, and Davey tangles his hands in Jack’s hair in desperation.

Jack pulls back for a minute and tentatively lifts a hand to Davey’s shirt collar, pinching one of the buttons between his fingers. His eyes meet Davey’s, gaze questioning and full of hidden implications, and Davey nods, panting and trembling.

Jack presses a soft kiss to his jaw before he goes back to the task at hand, undoing the buttons on Davey’s shirt one by one until he slides it off altogether. Davey shivers a little and his skin flushes, feeling exposed and vulnerable, but the hungry look in Jack’s eyes stops his insecurities in their tracks.

Jack stares at him in awe for a second and then his hands are all over him, hot and desperate and longing, and he clambers on top of him, pressing Davey flat into the hard surface of the roof. And it would hurt, but then Jack _devours_ his mouth, his arms braced around him firm and unyielding, and Davey dissolves into a moaning, writhing mess.

“Jack, please—” He begs, hands frantically grappling with the buttons on Jack’s shirt. Jack groans and helps him with the last few buttons, throwing his shirt carelessly to the side before he dives back in.

He grinds their hips together and Davey whines high in his throat, craving more of that delicious friction. Their lips meet again, hard and needy and filthy, and Davey feels mindless with how much he wants this. _Needs_ this.

“God, Jack, please, I need—”

Jack curses under his breath and nods, chest heaving and eyes blown wide and lips swollen, and the sight alone sends a wave of burning desire through him. He pulls back and runs a tentative hand along the waistband of Davey’s trousers, looking at him carefully. “Are you sure, Dave?”

Davey swallows thickly and then nods, not trusting his voice.

Jack groans and undoes the button, pulling them down Davey’s legs and tossing them to the side. Davey feels unbearably shy and exposed, shivering from the sudden cold and refusing to meet Jack’s gaze. He bites his bottom lip, the anxiety and self-doubt crashing through him like a tidal wave, but then Jack’s voice interrupts him from his internal spiraling.

“Christ, Davey, you’re beautiful,” He murmurs, voice so soft and reverent that it hardly even sounds like his. Davey blushes and shakes his head, still not meeting his eyes.

“Hey,” Jack cups his cheek and tilts his head up to look at him, touch gentle and loving, and his eyes are so full of fondness and adoration that Davey wants to cry. “I mean it, Dave. You’re… _God_ , you’re gorgeous,” He breathes, pressing a trail of soft kisses down Davey’s neck.

Davey lets out a soft whimper and feels tears sting his eyes, just barely. Jack notices immediately and pulls back a little, resting a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Hey, are you sure about this? We don’t have to, ya’ know—” He says, and his voice is soft and delicate, reassuring, though Davey can tell he’s just as nervous and uncertain.

Davey shakes his head, blinking back the tears. “No, Jack, I want to. I _really_ want to,” he promises, and he _means_ it. “It’s just…a lot.”

Jack nods and gives him a sad smile, running a thumb across his jawline. “I know. And I promise ya’, we don’t have ta’ do anything you ain’t ready for,” he assures, eyes full of promise and understanding. “I know this is…new, and it’s a lot, and we may be movin’ too fast, but—” he swallows, blinking nervously, “I love ya’, Dave, and I’ll give you anything. Anything at all. Just say the word.”

Davey feels a wave of affection surge through him and he gazes up at Jack, heart pounding as he looks for any trace of doubt or hesitance. He bites his lip, willing the fear and trepidation to back down, and takes a few deep breaths. He replays Jack’s words in his head, turning them over and over again in his mind, and they fill him with a calmness and reassurance that is both terrifying and exhilarating.

Because he knows, down to his bones, that Jack means it—that Jack would give him anything and would do anything for him, and that he would never push him to do something he didn’t want to—and that makes his fears seem minuscule and insignificant.

Because Jack is _here_ , a warm presence above him, and he’s looking at Davey like he’s the only thing in the entire universe that matters. And that, as trivial as it may sound, makes all the difference in the world. It makes Davey feel safe, secure, _wanted_ , and the grim thoughts swirling around in his mind pale in comparison.

Because no one’s ever looked at him like that before. And while it may be reckless, while it may be dangerous, while it may go against everything he’s ever known, Davey Jacobs wants Jack Kelly with every fiber of his being. And right here, safe in Jack’s arms, hidden away from the rest of the world, Davey feels that maybe, just maybe, that’s not such a bad thing to want after all.

“I want you, Jack,” he says, and his voice is full of a new fire, strong and certain and unwavering. “I want you _tonight_.”

Jack’s mouth falls open slightly in astonishment and he swallows, eyes darkening just slightly before he nods, confident and sure. “You got it, Dave,” he breathes, and he crashes their lips back together in a heated, frenzied kiss.

They dissolve into a hazy mess of kissing and touching, all breathless panting and thundering hearts and mindless wanting as they scramble to tear away the rest of the fabric separating them. Jack wrestles with his pants for several seconds before he finally tears them off and throws them to the side sloppily.

When they’re both completely bare they just lay there for a minute, heated skin pressed flush together, eyes blown wide in the dark, as they pant and tremble in anticipation. Davey stares up at Jack in awe, the sight fueling the heated desire building in his belly, and he shivers at the fresh rush of need that courses through him.

Jack shifts so that they’re more comfortable and brushes a strand of hair out of Davey’s eyes, pressing a soft, tender kiss to his earlobe. He trails a warm hand across Davey’s skin, touch reverent and focused, before he lifts a tentative finger to the outside of Davey’s entrance, circling gently. “Davey, can I—"

Davey nods vigorously, not trusting his voice, and he wants this so badly it almost hurts.

Jack turns and presses a soft kiss to his lips before pressing a finger in, just barely, and Davey feels like all the breath has been knocked out of him.

“Are you okay?” Jack breathes, soft and tender, and Davey wants to cry with how much he loves him.

“ _Yes, Jack_ , God—” he moans, shaking as he adjusts to the feeling. It feels odd, but not entirely unwelcome, and Davey finds himself squirming a little in search of more.

Jack stares down at him in amazement, running a gentle hand down his back and across his ribs as he slowly works him open. “God, you’re beautiful.”

Davey whimpers, face flushed and breathing labored, and Jack adds a second finger, scissoring them and stretching Davey open further and further. He presses deeper, searching and prodding, until Davey _screams_ , hips bucking up in pure ecstasy.

Jack smiles in satisfaction and presses on, adding a third finger and doing his best to hit that spot on every thrust. Davey is an absolute wreck, writhing underneath him and crying out in euphoria.

“It feels so good,” Davey pants, the pleasure almost overwhelming. “It’s not supposed to feel this good.”

Jack kisses him, deep and hot and searing, as Davey bucks against his fingers, hips jerking frantically in search of more.

Davey can feel something shifting, tightening, can feel the pleasure start to crest and threaten to overtake him, and it’s incredible, God, it’s everything he’s ever wanted, but he needs _more_.

“ _Jack, please, I need_ —” He gasps out, and the want and desire coursing through his veins is so strong that it almost hurts.

Jack slows his movements and gazes at him, and the look in his eyes alone sends a shudder down Davey’s spine.

“Dave?” He breathes, and the unspoken question passes between them, forbidden words and unspeakable desires shifting through the night air, and Davey feels his lips move in affirmation, a soft “yes” that’s so quiet it can hardly be heard.

Jack gazes at him in wonder, eyes burning with such a fierce intensity that it takes Davey’s breath away, and he gasps out a shaky “okay.”

And Davey is scared, _terrified_ , but when Jack’s looking at him like that, so full of longing and desperation and _love_ , he feels like maybe, just _maybe_ , everything will be alright. _They’ll_ be alright.

Jack nods and exhales, looking into Davey’s eyes with a silent promise. He kisses him once again and hesitates for just a second longer, gives Davey time to change his mind, and slips inside. And God, Davey can’t _breathe_ through the fullness of it all.

“Are you okay?” Jack breathes, soft and full of concern, pressing a soft kiss to Davey’s forehead as he strains to keep himself from moving.

Davey gives a shaky nod, eyes scrunched tight as he tries to adjust to the burning stretch. “Yeah, I’m fine, it’s just— _oh_ ,” he trails off, letting out a soft moan when Jack reaches down to wrap a hand around him, pumping lightly to distract him from the discomfort.

The pain slowly starts to transition into pleasure and Davey squirms a little in Jack’s lap, trying to pull him impossibly deeper. “Jack—“ Davey whines, and the want and desire he feels is so strong it threatens to knock the breath out of him.

Jack looks at him, eyes blown wide and darkened with longing, and Davey’s whole body shudders. “Yeah, Dave?”

_“Move.”_

Jack groans, giving a shaky nod before he pulls almost all the way out and thrusts back in. He starts up a steady pace, rocking into him slowly but purposefully, and Davey feels like his mind is scattering to pieces.

A mindless stream of breaths and pants tumble from Davey’s lips as he rolls his hips in time with Jack’s thrusts. He gasps out Jack’s name like a prayer, and any lingering guilt or uncertainty evaporates further and further with each second. Because right here, right now, with Jack Kelly moving inside him, his heart racing and body on fire with pleasure, Davey Jacobs feels more whole, more real, more _alive_ than he’s ever felt.

He catches sight of Jack, skin flushed and lips red and eyes blown wide in the dark as he pulses inside him, and the warmth that floods through his chest is almost too much to bear. It’s indescribable, and it feels almost sacred, like a spiritual experience, and Davey loves it so much that it hurts. And while it may be wrong, while it may go against everything he’s ever known, Davey knows without a doubt that if this is wrong, he doesn’t want to be right.

“Harder, Jack, please,” Davey begs, hot and desperate and full of need. Jack curses and starts pounding into him with renewed purpose, hard and deep, and Davey’s love for him surges, like a fire in his soul.

“Fuck, Dave, you’re—God, you’re amazing,” Jack pants, his thrusts relentless and determined, and Davey moans, bucking against him with everything he has.

The feelings start to crest, pleasure coming to a crescendo as Davey presses back harder against Jack’s thrusts. They’re both panting, soft whimpers and groans passing through the night, and it feels so good, so sinful that Davey’s eyes fill with tears. Jack presses in deeper and hits that spot, the one that makes Davey weak in the knees, and Davey falls apart with a strangled sob of Jack’s name.

Pleasure, white hot and unbearable, ripples through him, and he can’t breathe, can’t see, can’t do anything but lay there and feel Jack moving inside him, working him through the pleasure, and God, it’s _exhilarating_. It’s everything he’s ever wanted but never dreamed he could have.

Davey collapses into him, sinking into the warmth and safety of Jack’s arms as he slowly comes back down to Earth. Jack runs a gentle hand through his hair, soft and tender and so full of love that Davey wants to cry. He presses a soft kiss to his temple and Davey keens, relishing in the soft warmth of Jack’s body against his.

“Are you okay?” Jack breathes as he pulls Davey closer, heart beating warm and heavy against his chest. Davey can hear the anxiety in his voice, the unspoken fear that he’s hurt him somehow, and knowing the depth of Jack’s concern for him makes his heart seize in his chest.

“Yeah, Jackie, I’m okay,” Davey assures. He lets out a soft, contented breath and gazes up at him with a look of pure adoration, still feeling blissed out of his mind. “I’m more than okay.”

Jack looks at him in wonder and astonishment for a moment before he smiles, bright and wide and utterly captivated. “God, Davey, you’re incredible,” he muses, pressing a soft kiss to the side of his mouth as he cradles him close to his chest, and Davey feels his face flush.

They lay there for hours, tangled together and breathless as they process what just happened. Davey knows there’s a conversation to be had, that they have to talk about this, what it means for them and their future, but right here, right now, safe in Jack’s arms, he finds that he’s content to just be held.

“Jackie?” He murmurs after a while, nuzzling closer into Jack’s chest.

Jack looks down at him, eyes so soft and loving that Davey melts all over again. “Yeah, Dave?”

He swallows and gazes back at Jack, heart thundering with love and fondness and devotion. “I meant it, you know,” he says, eyes full of honesty and promise. “That I love you, I mean,” he adds at Jack’s confused look.

Davey can feel the way Jack’s heart stutters in his chest, the way he lets out a soft gasp, barely audible, as he stares at him in disbelief, and _God_ , that does something to Davey’s heart. “Yeah?” He asks, and his voice is quieter than Davey has ever heard it.

Davey nods and smiles, real and genuine, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips as he settles further into his embrace. Jack lets out a soft little laugh, delighted and blissful, and he holds Davey close, their bodies pressed flush together.

“I love you too, Dave,” he murmurs against his lips, and the smile on his face is enough to warm Davey from the inside out. “So much.”

Davey smiles and sinks back into his arms, Jack’s heartbeat strong and steady in his ear. He falls asleep like that, head tucked against Jack’s chest and Jack’s arms wrapped tightly around him, and for the first time in a long time, he feels hopeful.

Because Jack Kelly _loves_ him, and while he knows it’ll be hard, that it’s still very new and so many things can go wrong, he can’t bring himself to care. All of his fears and insecurities and doubts seem to fade into the background, those words that have haunted him for so long outshined by the fact that right here, right now, Jack is the only thing in the world that matters.

When he’s with Jack, he feels complete, he feels alive, he feels _whole_ , and he wouldn’t trade that feeling for anything in the world. And laying here, sated and breathless in Jack’s arms, safe and warm and secure, Davey thinks that maybe, just maybe, that’s enough.

**Author's Note:**

> If you made it this far, thank you so much for reading! ;)
> 
> Originally this was going to be a songfic but then it kind of morphed into something else--still, if you haven't heard Matt Bloyd and Jeremy Jordan's cover of 'Hallelujah' yet, please stop what you're doing and go listen. I promise you won't be disappointed.
> 
> This is the first thing I've written for Newsies and the first fic I've written at all in years, so if there are issues with pacing, characterization, etc., that's why. Please don't hesitate to comment--I live for feedback!
> 
> Thanks again for reading!


End file.
